The Freedom of Magnificent Mess is the reflection this morning, as I looked at my room of pilled up clothes, suitcase on the floor surrounded by different stacks of paper and journals. Other piles of technology and cords over there and shoes awaiting a return home.

I laughed, those that knew the aspect of this self from years ago, may remember the sayings I had. I loved clean surfaces and everything had a place to live, I never really understood the messy ones!

What I was doing - you see- was controlling my environment. Controlling what felt was in my reach in the chaos of my world back then.

The Doer!
Always doing.

I would look at my teenage girls room ( way back when) and shake my head as to how it could possibly get to such a state.

Really, I could not understand.

From a young age I cleaned and kept house for my family. I was a little mum, sweeping, vacuuming, ironing, cooking, washing up etc. 

When I looked at a room it was like a work of art, colour, pattern, texture. My mum is very creative in her decorating hence always lovely materials to use. Pillows and throws of colour, and so many pictures and ornaments, plants etc. A creatives dream canvas in many ways.

I love my mums house, it truely is like small eclectic still life, or installations everywhere you look. Even in the bathroom (If only I could show you). 

My point is, I laughed today at the recognition that, I am free! 
Free of any conditioning that I have to be a certain way, any way!

From still life to abstraction and beyond.....

The mess, is my free mind in flow.
No need to control my environment in the ways of the past ‘lower’ mind. 

This post is my reflection on the turning upside down of what many have been conditioned to believe. Cleanliness is godliness, idle hands are the ...., our environment mirrors our internal state and the like.

In fact for me it is the opposite! I have such clarity and focus in flow with All around and within me, that I have no want, need or desire to control the physical surrounds in the same way.

The merge is fluid so where one space starts and another ends is of no concern. Allowing myself and the extensions of The Self to Be. 

From Doing, too Being. 

Even further extension is my present state of Areing. 
Doing. Being, too Areing. 

In this vibrational state of human-ing is moving as one organism, a discussion for another day.

Today in this moment we ARE not doing or being any thing. NO Thing.

The room is rooming, clothes are clothing, stacks of books are booking. No Thing for me to Do.

No worry, no concerns, no thoughts that I MUST tidy. It is all in homeostasis, and flows as …… 

Giggling on the past where I would clean rather than go out or create. Now I create and travel rather than clean! Choice, yet I review my state of mind again, and see there are no fears, no ruminations, no I should’s, and the like. No conditioning that say’s I Have too or I am seen as…….. 

As I AM regardless of the room! I AM all I place intention and feel into I AM. 

My external place, body or environment no longer dictates this.

So I laugh at what the old self would say about this. I giggle that she would no way even have a book on the floor let alone her pile of research. 

This is reminding me of where I am now. That I AM in the NOW, as when in that flow the items in the room will morph and move as they AARRRRREEEE~~~ the one organism. As it breathes in and out, things shift and transform. 

My mess is not my anxiety! 
The mess is my freedom from the past fears and anxious programming.

The freedom that comes from the magnificence of the mess! 

I would love to hear your reflection on this post,
Can you relate or are your experiences different?

Have you struggled with control of your environment from a place of lack, fear or anxiety?
What are your experiences and wisdom from it?
Share here or PM me.

Much Love from my luscious messing)))))))))

Cynthia


​

What would happen if you ran towards what you disliked?

Walked towards what made you feel discomfort?

What about that which produced physical reaction, or a memory of the past experiences you’d rather forget?

I invite you to contemplate; What comes to mind when you move into these spaces of mind, memory, environment, experience.

Do you trust the/your self?
Do you trust the/your body?
Do you trust the/your minds?

Where is it that you feel the push away?
The sensation that you may need to run, suppress or hide?

The places and spaces internal or external that we cordon off from the present are what (in my experience) create knots in our time lines. Interruption of our continual flow and evolution.

So much energy is invested into the bank accounts of the past to ensure that information stays put in the dungeons, the vault of that remembrance.

However, it is all the weave of the same jumper, and if we stop the loom over the left chest and weave around it. We end up with a jumper that exposes a left breast. Making the well made and beautifully crafted cloth, not fully functional for keeping the chest warm. This is how I see the attempted deletion of our story.

What I have found on my life journey is the incidents so horrific in the past were silenced, which made them scream louder.

So they were buried, which made them rise as ghosts.

They were numbed out which produced symptoms that prevented my ignorance.

I’m not saying it is an immediate process that all can do right now. No, what I am sharing is the awareness of it being a process, and with support you too can start to look at what you barricaded out of your life.

Thing is, when I realised that certain incidents in life actually held me small, held me captive in that state of density consciousness. What came to me was that if I faced it toe to toe, from where I am now, what would it look like?

Would the same emotions and physical sensations present. Did the stress response react the same, or was it different now, if different, how so?

I was withdrawing some of the treasured energy I had deposited in that account of the past. This allowed more for the present, more to have now, and with it the ability to re weave the missing threads into the fabric of life, no longer a gapping gap at my chest.

Many of us run on a small percentage of our daily energy stores, so much is in the past happenings. It is possible to have the memories without the charge on them? I am proof of that.

Once I started to open and withdraw my energy reserve from the old story. Instantly I witnessed my life fill with more abundance. Opportunities, meeting people, inspiration, creativity, wisdom, everything was flowing to me, I didn't have to do much at all.

When I peeked over the wall I had built, it was ok. Yes there were tears touching on the whole spectrum of emotions. Yet it was immediately strengthening, the vulnerability was my courage. The courage was my brave heart which brought me Truth and an expansion of Love.

We build the huge barriers and walls to prevent any access of that past into our present. For me it left bits of myself in the desert, seemingly lost to the present. To Re-Member The Self I wen't on the 'Sheroes' Journey, looking at the monsters and realising they were just shadows on the wall that I myself had built!!

There is no separation of those aspects of the self, the past you, the present you or the future you. We can choose where to INVEST our Energy and we can transform the story of the past, re-storying, taking back our strength and empower the Self.

We become the authors of our own life, we can write what that is to look like now!!

Can you relate to any of this?
Let me know here or PM me if you have felt by keeping a piece of the past secret or quiet it has cut off an aspect of your current potential experience.

Maybe you would like support to look at your energy accounts and see where you can address your past, and transfer the energy resources to your current account for the present potential, here Now.

Connect with me here or at www.rhombushealingarts.com

Much Love
Cynthia

May you gift and be gifted from the overflow. ​